The HGC Denver Library
These are the books I return to again and again — with couples, in my own marriage, and in my personal growth. Each one has shaped how I think about relationships, faith, and healing.
Recommended Books
Essential reading from Drs. John and Julie Gottman
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
by John Gottman & Nan Silver
"The Essential Gottman Guide"
The definitive guide based on 40 years of research. This is the book I recommend to every couple — it's practical, research-backed, and transformative. - Darren
Eight Dates
by John Gottman, Julie Gottman, Doug Abrams & Rachel Carlton Abrams
"Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love"
Eight transformative conversations every couple needs to have. From trust to sex to money, this book guides you through the essential topics that build lasting intimacy. - Darren
The Gottman Card Decks
by John Gottman & Julie Gottman
"Love Maps, Open-Ended Questions & More"
Interactive card decks to deepen your connection. These are fantastic tools for building love maps and sparking meaningful conversations. I use these with couples all the time. - Darren
Therapeutic Reads
Brené Brown, Curt Thompson, and other essential therapeutic reads
Daring Greatly
by Brené Brown
"How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms"
Brené Brown's groundbreaking work on vulnerability and shame. Vulnerability isn't weakness — it's the birthplace of love, belonging, and connection. - Darren
The Gifts of Imperfection
by Brené Brown
"Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be"
Embrace who you are with wholehearted living. Brown teaches us to cultivate courage, compassion, and connection — the foundation of authentic relationships. - Darren
Anatomy of the Soul
by Curt Thompson
"Surprising Connections Between Neuroscience and Spiritual Practices"
Dr. Thompson bridges neuroscience and spiritual formation. Understanding how our brains work helps us understand how we relate to God and others. Profound and practical. - Darren
The Soul of Shame
by Curt Thompson
"Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves"
Shame is one of the most destructive forces in relationships. Thompson shows how to recognize shame's voice and replace it with God's truth. Healing and hope-filled. - Darren
Healing the Trauma of Infidelity
by William M. Bumberry, PhD
"Powerful Skills for Rebuilding Trust and Attachment"
Infidelity is one of the most devastating wounds a relationship can endure. This book offers a clear, compassionate path through the trauma toward genuine healing and renewed trust. - Darren
Adventures in Sex
by Heidi Anderson Sauder, PhD & Hannah Koch Aragoni, PsyD
"Journaling to Create Desire, Passion, Romance & A Fun Sex Life"
A guided journal that helps couples intentionally cultivate desire, playfulness, and intimacy. Practical, thoughtful, and a great tool for couples who want to invest in their physical connection. - Darren
Faith & Relationships
C.S. Lewis, Gary Thomas, and faith-based relationship wisdom
Mere Christianity
by C.S. Lewis
"The Timeless Classic"
Lewis's masterpiece on the essentials of faith. His insights on love, virtue, and human nature are foundational for understanding Christian relationships. A must-read. - Darren
The Four Loves
by C.S. Lewis
"Affection, Friendship, Eros, Charity"
Lewis explores the four types of human love with brilliant clarity. Understanding these distinctions transforms how we love our spouse, friends, and God. Deeply insightful. - Darren
The Screwtape Letters
by C.S. Lewis
"Letters from a Senior to a Junior Devil"
Lewis's satirical masterpiece reveals how spiritual warfare affects our relationships. Witty, convicting, and eye-opening about the subtle ways we sabotage love. - Darren
Sacred Marriage
by Gary Thomas
"What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy?"
Marriage isn't just about happiness — it's about holiness. Thomas shows how God uses marriage to shape us into Christ's image. Challenging and transformative. - Darren
A Note from Darren
These are affiliate links — if you purchase through them, I receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend books I've personally read and believe in. Every title on this list has made a real difference in my life or in the lives of couples I work with.
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